The Younger Days

Many people have different early life experiences my early days weren't some of the nicest as a matter of fact I was not the person I am today. Back when I was at the age of 5-8 8-12 different stages of my life definitely more wilder than now. As you grow up lots of things end up changing for me it was an entire lifetime. I struggled my first years in school as I was that one kid that craved attention and was pushed away by teammates perhaps also because of our different ways of behaving. At one point I ended up sitting outside because I was outcasted by all of my classmates definitely a dark period for me. lots of moments where I was definitely bullied or acted way different than others more mischievous or sometimes I would do things last minute it definitely turned out to be an interesting series of events

To stack it all up I either ended up being someone who easily lost a lot of things didn't hold the best organization and my environment was not very supportive towards my goals or objective I ended up moving out from my home into a another country. I had a complete change of scenery when I did. I had a lot of friends I had made from back then and then in one swoop everything changed I was told that I was going to be moving to the United States. At first I didn't know much about it. As a matter of fact at first I wasn't too thrilled at the Idea since I lived in a two story home and pretty much I had almost my own room. I didn't end up developing any ideas until later. Then when I moved out things started to change some problems stayed with me while other problems rose up. As I grew up I ended up being split from people I had met from my old home.

I ended up moving to the United States with both my mother and father. Sometimes the reality is that I wanted a completely normal family. I never received such things and when I was younger I was completely oblivious to all of it I didn't care about anything. Completely, Innocent so many of the things I felt seemed to not be very important when you're a kid you tend to be more care free and more innocent and judgement is very different if you made errors but even then parents did end up having moments where they sorted out having to hit me or my sister if we ever got rebellious or didn't listen to them. I did have some very good moments in the midst of chaos or understanding but I was also sent to be part of church group and meetings sometimes I would be active in their community and as matter of fact I remember when they did most kermes in Mexico where people would gather and eat a l0t of food. Yet something always felt strange during everytime I went I think I could feel that things were going to be changing it does feel like that sometimes.

Anyways, when I moved out I felt like I was in a different world were people wouldn't go out as much. Not only that to me school for me felt almost like a prison and during those years I made comparisons to it. I ended up slacking quite a lot but I did manage to eventually, learn and master English that I know and I'm able to have conversations but it didn't start like that. They put me to be in the computer repeating the lessons over and over. Throughout time I was judged by those close to me and a lot of time I wasn't allowed into their friend groups which became a lot like a trope for me to be almost like someone who created a lot of chaos while trying to join such friend groups. I don't know if they knew my intentions or not but regardless it ended up being pretty heavily judged especially coming from my early years in elementary. I spent an entire year devoted to just crying only because everything was so odd to me. I felt like a foreigner like I really didn't belong there. But, then if I didn't belong there where did I belong? I think over time that question ended up being more obvious. Over time that same friend group ended up all separated from each other. Some gained more popularity while others ended up being sent into other schools or moving out. In the end everyone ended up in different spots in life. Others went on to become really successful people. Some have even passed or gone through tragedy as well.

That puts me here now I am now with my close friend group and living with my father at the moment. even though when I was younger I was living with my mother. Though all of that did change. There was times were I had some really big ideas and it was not supported at all. Some of those Ideas never seemed the light of days I was making a lot of big efforts. They ended up failing even though I had taken some steps. On my steps to finish such project never ended up happening and I could see why some things never worked out. While living out I actually spent some time living on my own on a van and at the time I didn't have any income or was short on money to do a lot of things living was hard but regardless I always tried my best. I wish some of those things would have worked out there are a lot of stages in my life I guess I've always had it rough since I wasn't very strategic with my ways of operation. But regardless of what happened through all of those times now is always a good time to share all of it. Since, I end up usually thinking a lot I think its good to kind of put all the perspective in!!!

See You guys on the next one